Every person going through hard times needs an anchor to bring some type of stability in their storm. Momentarily, mine is Psalm 23. It seems I have become quite addicted to it, and that speaks volumes to me since for the better part of my life I found the Bible to be boring, putting me to sleep faster than a lullaby.

What’s your anchor? You must have one, if not, it may be wise to get one so when the storm hits, and it will, you have something to hold on.

“…he renews my strength (soul).” Depending what version of the Bible you read.

For me, last week has been a hard one full of pain, one emergency trip, IVs, insurance troubles, brother sick, niece sick, kids fighting, and past emotional trauma resurfacing due to few conversations with my ill brother. You see, he’s hunted by the same emotional nightmares I’ve suffered from for years, but I began talking about it right after I’ve heard God nudging me to do so. I question this approach many times but keep moving on. Then I feel it, that renewing of strength he speaks about it.

“…and I will live in the house of the Lord forever.”:)

Since I began speaking this out loud before bed-time, my dreams have been void of torment/nightmares, I wrestled a demon effortlessly and successfully in my dream, my thoughts are clearer. I understand not all of you will agree with this, may think it’s hokey-pocky stuff or who knows what else. I’m alright with that. There are many things I have a hard time still believing but gradually, as it usually happens with growth and healing, I begin seeing life a little different. I see the beauty in the cracks and the imperfections most of us find threatening. Soo…

The Lord is YOUR shepherd; YOU have all that YOU need. He lets YOU rest in green meadows; he leads YOU beside peaceful streams. He renews YOUR strength:) He guides YOU along right paths, bringing honor to his name. Even when YOU walk through the darkest valley, YOU will not be afraid, for he is close to YOU. His staff and rod comforts YOU. He prepares a feast for YOU in the presence of YOUR enemies. He honors YOU by anointing YOUR head with oil. YOUR cup overflows with blessings. Surely goodness and unfailing love will pursue YOU all the days of YOUR life, and YOU will live in the house of the Lord forever.

Have a brilliant day!

This morning I had an interesting dream.

A structural shift was going on in all the nations of this planet. Every nation, represented by a certain color and scattered all over the earth began moving towards an invisible  center, organizing itself in lines according to their nation, moving rhythmically and in a togetherness forming  this.   Then I woke up.

Am avut un vis interesant. Toate natiunile pamintului, imprastiate pe intregul pamint si representate print-o culoare, au inceput sa se uneasca intr-un dans armonius formind imaginea de mai sus. Pe urma m-am trezit. 

Medical details in the Home page.

Now I can go and shower:)))))))))))

Love this look, I may go shorter in few months but for now, I’m dancing on clouds with my new haircut:)

Imi place enorm freza noua si cred ca-l voi taia si mai scurt in citeva luni.

Be the one that believes, no matter the bruises, no matter the hurts, no matter the pain, no matter the statistics, no matter what others say, you are that one percent that will make it;)

Uber– close to a cab experience, the drivers seem very experienced, the cars are clean, its less expensive than getting a cab, you sign up with an app, your card is on file, you don’t deal with cash, the payment is taken automatically from your card.

Lyft- your driver is a regular person looking to make extra cash, even less expensive than Uber, they use their personal cars, so far they seemed very clean, you don’t deal with cash, you download the app sign up put your card on file and they take it out automatically. The second driver, a woman, her navigation skills were not top notch but she was a nice lady and we got to my destination which to me was the most important part:)

Personal note-Lyft drivers; First one had it’s B-day that day and was going to have a B-B-Que with his friends. He asked me cooking suggestions for corn on the cob. The second driver, the woman with navigational hick-ups, was hoping to buy a house soon. I gave her some ideas since I had a dab of knowledge in this area from my real estate times.

For the picky ones out there Uber will be better, for the charismatic ones out there any would work for you, for the penny pincher, Lyft would work better for you or you take your own car:)

 ReachNow vs Car 2 go

Both are a car rental per minute services. You have to download an app, put your credit card info in there and use it.

Reach out– No key required, everything is built in the dashboard, most cars are Mini Cooper and BMW, nice and clean, you don’t need to worry about feeling the gas, if you do you get a credit back, these drive within city limits, it’s great for people living in the city without a car. However, we have tried this services four times, each time with some type of problem. (Car not opening, car not locking after use, car not unlocking). 49 cents per minute, when parked the rate is 30 cents a minute, you don;t pay for insurance, fuel, parking or maintenance.

Car 2 go- smart cars only, same set up as ReachNow but they actually work, available everywhere downtown (lots of cars available). 41 cents per minute +tax/fees. You don’t pay for parking, fuel or maintenance. 

From personal experience, even though the ReachNow cars are nicer to drive, Car 2 go worked without any problems every time, which we used it about 8 times now without one problem.

Cand lucrurile merg prost, dorim ajutor dar când lucrurile se schimbă în mod tragic dorim un miracol. Pentru majoritatea din noi miracolul nu va veni. Ce vom face atunci? Ceea ce am să-ti spun te va supăra, mai ales daca esti genul de persoana care vrea ca totul sa fie fixat rapid, aproximativ 99,9% dintre noi se potrivesc în această categorie. Voi începe prin a spune …

Atunci când a murit fratele meu mai mic, cel mai tragic lucru care sa întâmplat în viața mea și eu sunt sigură că si in viața familiei mele, am devenit amorțită emotional. Am interogat atât de multe lucruri legate de viață și de Dumnezeu, lucruri care le-am auzit o viață intreaga de la părinții mei și biserică. Dar in general m-am simțit amorțită, urmată de valuri imense de furie, uneori copleșitoare. Mânia încă mai vine, dar valurile sunt mult mai mici și am învățat să-le las să se spele peste mine fixindu-mi privirea spre viitor. Cînd pierzi pe cineva simți durere doar numai dacă ai iubit, chiar dacă timpul împreaună a fost mult prea scurt. Dar nu fi supărat toată viața ta gândindu-te că, Doamne ferește, daca începi să te bucuri de viata intr-un fel trădezi persoana pierdută. Ei ne privesc de sus și dacă ar putea vorbi cu noi, ne-ar sfătui să dăm drumul furiei din suflet si să ne bucurăm de viață. Pe patul de moarte, și am fost acolo un an și jumătate în urmă, 99,9% dintre lucrurile care ne stresează in viață nu contează, doar un singur lucru contează; dragostea fața de Dumnezeu, sine și cei de alături. Atit. Nimic altceva. Acum, recuperarea mea de pe patul de moarte a fost un miracol. Așa cred și nu mă va convinge nimeni altfel. Înapoi la fratele meu. Nu voi înțelege niciodată de ce un băiat de unsprezece ani nu a primit un miracol de la Dumnezeu, dar în același timp nu pretind să înțeleag complexitatea vieții atit pe plan spiritual cit si in trup. În realitate majoritatea din noi nu înțeleagem pe deplin secretele adînci a vieții, fapt ce umple multe inimi cu mânie, urmată de o trăire bazată pe această mânie, luînd decizii cu mânie în suflet și pe urmă întoarcem pumnul nostru sus la Dumnezeu când întîmpinăm consecințele acestei mânii.

Dar ce am găsit de-a lungul drumului vieții? Rezistența. Și aceasta este, de asemenea, un miracol. Pentru a fi în stare să înduri greutățile vieții, cu un bun simț al umorului și o speranță. Chiar zilele trecute mi-am prins degetele într-o ușă și plângind i-am zis lui Chet;

“Mă bucur atât de mult că-mi merge sistemul nervos și că simt durerea asta!” M-am întors la plâns cu o adevărata mulțumire in suflet că puteam simți propria mea durere, știind că trupul meu a reacționat normal.  Cu ceva luni în urmă eram în pericolul de a-mi pierde aceasta abilitate din cauza bolii. Deci, vezi, rezistența este la fel de frumosă, dacă știi cum să te uiți la ea și să îi mulțumești lui Dumnezeu pentru toți oamenii care au îndurat o mare adversitate și durere numai pentru a ne inspira mai târziu în viață. Iar dacă victoria care-ai așteapt-o nu vine niciodată, cel puțin ai îndurat cu o atitudine bună și ai construit prieteni și amintiri; cele mai adevărate comori pe acest pământ.

Fie ca Dumnezeu să vă binecuvânteze astăzi și păstrați-ți inima plină de fericire.

Pentru cei ce înțeleg Engleza.

When things go wrong, we want help, when things go really wrong we want a miracle. For most of us that miracle never comes. Now what? What I’m about to tell you will make you mad, especially if you’re the type of person that wants everything fixed quickly, which about 99.9% of us fit in that category. I’ll start by saying…

When my little brother died, which by far it’s been the most tragic thing that happened in my life and I’m sure the life of my immediate family, I became numb. I questioned so many things related to life and God, things that were taught to me my whole life by my parents and the church. But mostly I felt numb. Than the anger came, in overwhelmingly big waves at times. The anger still comes, but the waves are far smaller and I’ve learned to let them wash over me than move on. Don’t pretend the hurt is not there, it’s part of loving and losing someone precious, if you don’t hurt you’ve never loved, so find a sliver of comfort realizing that you hurt because you loved and it was all worth it even if short lived. But don’t be angry your whole life thinking that if you move on and, God forbid, you start enjoying life somehow you’re betraying the person you lost. They’re watching us and if they could talk to us they would advise us to let go of anger. On your death bed, and I’ve been there a year and a half ago, 99.9% of things don’t matter, only one thing does matter; love and the beautiful consequences love made in your life and in the lives of those you loved. That’s it. Nothing else. Now my recovery from almost dying was a miracle. That’s what I believe and that’s all that matters to me. Back to my brother. I’ll never understand why an eleven year old boy did not receive a miracle from God, but I don’t pretend to understand the bigger picture of life either. In truth none of us fully understand it and for most, that alone fills our hearts with anger, than we operate out of that anger and turn our fist up at God when the consequences of that anger comes around.

But what have I found along the way? Endurance. And that is also a miracle. To be able to endure life’s hardships with a good sense of humor and a hope. Just the other day I slammed my fingers pretty hard in a cabinet door and as I was crying I told Chet;

“I’m so glad my nerve endings work and I can feel that!” Than went back to crying truly thankful that I could feel my own pain, knowing that my body was reacting just as it should. Only few months ago I was in serious danger of loosing that ability due to disease. So you see, endurance is just as beautiful if you know how to look at it and I thank God for all the great people that endured great adversity and pain only to inspire us later on in life. And if the victory you expect never comes, at least you’ve endured with a great attitude and most likely built friends and memories, the truest treasures on this earth.

May God bless you today and keep your heart full of happiness.

If you have time this is good.

Since some symptoms have returned (tingling in right fingertips, fever, joint pain, muscle soreness, vision clarity decrease, ability to retain info decreased, irritability increased, itchy spots on the body, headaches, confusion, feeling as if I have nose bleeds, fatigue and left side pain under the ribs ) I knew it was time to re-enter the realm of IV’s. I’ve missed about three weeks of treatment due to us moving. Since I no longer have my friend Elizabeth living close by I had to turn to another realm, Uber services. But Uber, although pleasant was nothing like the special bond of friendship Elizabeth brought on our drives to and from every IV treatment.

It’s very similar to a taxi service, minus the bars (in some parts of the country), clean interiors and very nice drivers. First driver picked me up in front of the apartment building, and we had a great conversation all the way to Bellevue. I found out he’s from Ethiopia, and all other info I’ll keep confidential for his sake. On the way back the second driver told me he was from Africa (yes I know Africa is a continent, a big continent at that, but since that’s all the info he was willing to give to a stranger, go figure, I wasn’t about to pry).

I walked away with one important piece of information the second driver told me, a recipe for general good health that he uses, and from what I understood people in his country use as well. A mix of organic, pure honey (not the crummy industrial type), fresh ginger, garlic, black cumin seeds and if too strong for any beginner, some water. Every morning you take a teaspoon of the mix on an empty stomach, before even brushing your teeth and don’t eat for one hour. It keeps your immune system fired up for the whole day. Besides brushing his teeth he uses a particular type of wood stick to chew and rub on his teeth throughout the day, sold only in ethnic stores. He hasn’t gone to a doctor or dentist in ten years.

“I don’t have the need to, this keeps me healthy and organic food.” I love it!