Amu, ficari cu ali lui

Astazi ma palit iarasi si scriu pi moldovinesti si amu voi faci.

Duminica ne-am mutat in apartamentul care ni l-am cumparat amusilea di curind, dar dupi atita amar di munca ni dor tati chealea prin corp.

Ieri am sarbatorit, cum i obicheiul American, ziua multumirii la socrii acasa, oamini tari cumsecadi. Si am ris si am mancat si pi urma am plecat fuga inapoi acasa undi ni asteapta iara munca. Zic eu fuga, dar ne-o luat patru ori pana am ajuns acolea si iara inca patru ori pina am ajuns inapoi acasa, tati opt ori facuti in aceasi zi. Chet, sotul meu, a condus cam tata ziua, si cind nu a condus a stat la masa cu ai lui si eu linga el si am mancat, povistit si ris cit am putut di ghini. L-am vazut ci fericit era el in mijlocul familiei cu traditiile obisnuiti lui de mic si asta ma facut si pi mini sa zimbesc, si rid si sa ma bucur di tati date di Bunul Dumnezeu in viata noastra.

Cu o zi inainti am aflat ci al meu ficior al mari si-a pierdut postul di munca, asa ci fain frumos l-am luat si pi el cu noi si ne-am dus tati, impriuna la rudi si le-am facut surpriza. Si le fi vazut feteli lor plini di surpriza placuta, ca-i mai mari dragu sa faci surprize. Acolea am multumit impreuna dupa obiceiul American, obicei nascut in 1621, cind coloniile Pilgreme noi americane au celebrat prima recolta cu indienii, oamenii natali. Pilgrimii, un grup mari di oamini din Anglia, satui di opresie religioasa sau pus pi vapoari si au plecat sa-si cauti libertatea vietii. Au intrat pe teritoriu aista care pi vremea acheia era pamintul indienilor, au fost ajutati di indieni sa inceapa o viata noua cu recolta si alti lucruri, i-au hranit cu porumb si cartofi o vremi pina sau pus ei pi picioari si pi urma Pilgremii i-au omorit pi multi din indieni iar pe restul i-a asuprit. Nu stiu ce fel di libertati religioasa exact au cautat aistea oamini, ca nu cred eu ca au gasit-o omorind pi altii. Dar amu, sa lasam historia la o parti.

Am ajuns acasa la unu dimineata cu tati trei copii dupa noi si amu infara di mini, tati patru sforaie voiosi. Am ramas cu nisti dureri di cap de la oboseala, dar vad ca durerili vin cu inspiratie moldovineasca di scris. Cam rar pentru mini, mai ales ca am crescut in Transilvania si numai am fost nascuta in Botosani. Dar singili e singi, si-si aduce aminti de locurili natali. Dar te mai uiti?

Si uiti asa, fiecari cu ali lui:)

Va doresc o zi buna cu Bunul Dumnezeu linga voi.

We’ve moved.

Sunday we’ve moved and all four of us have been “dancing” between boxes the past two days and it will go like this for a good while. It’s both frustrating and hilarious as we’re trying to find our day to day essentials to live and have to make due with what we find:) Our bodies feel like ground-meat, and we moan and groan quite often. But we’re happy:) Alex set his room up the same day we moved in, that’s how exited he was to have his own space again. Magnolia is a new place to me, hardly familiar, but what I’ve seen so far I love. You can drive from one end to another in 10 minutes and today I drove to Ace Hardware, located six minutes away. It’s a quiet area with a slow paced life and I love that, for now at least. I hope I’m not going to get bored the minute all the un-packing is done. It reminds me of Federal Way, where we used to live but more quaint. I’m doing well, even if very tired. I found a new product that helps me tremendously, called NeuroCalm by Designs for Health. This product helps me keep calm. In fact after 10 minutes of the first intake I felt my muscles and neurological part began to relax and kept me relaxed most of the day without some weird side-effects or grogginess. As you may remember, some of my tests came back showing a deregulation in the neurotransmitters (body can’t seem to make them, and burns way to fast the existing ones), and along with my recent Lyme and co-infections treatment I wrote about in my last post, I believe, this product helps me tremendously.

The past four years of treatment and testing showed me a pattern, a pattern in findings with a main nucleons; weak autoimmune system. This weakening had been caused over the years and by a couple main issues; 1. too much toxicity in the body/tissues like black mold, mercury, fungi and other toxins, 2. lack of neurotransmitters (80% live in the gut) which is directly linked to neaurological issues, and third, gut issues (not enough good bacteria in the gut and an overload of bad bacteria). All these have been proved as major contributors to a weakened (collapsed, in my case) immune system that brought me dangerously close to an early death. I would also add another factor, a toxic soul/emotional self.

So my advise to everyone our there is this; take care of your gut, make sure you have lots of good bacteria growing in there and detox (do it smartly otherwise you could harm yourself), forgive and decide being a happy person is more important than being right and by doing these things you’ll strengthen your immune system. Strong immune system means no disease.

My unpacking break is coming to an end, so I wish you a good day and a Happy Thanksgiving:)

The ingredients in the NeuroCalm are:B-6, B-12, Magnezium, Inositol, Taurine, Chamomile, Gamma-aminobutryic, L-Theanine, 5-HTP, Phosphatidylserine. I was prescribed separately almost all of these ingredients after test rezults showed lack in these areas.

God Bless:)

Cu Biblia in mina si ura in suflet

Este un numar prea mare de copii abuza-ti in famiiile de pocaiti. Pe o latura se predica despre bunatatea lui Dumnezeu fata de omenire dar acasa, in intimitatea familiei, multi copii simt zilnic pe propria lor piele ura, furie si durere de la aceeasi persoana care poate cu citeva ore mai devreme era in biserica cu Biblia in mina si cu expresie falsa de sfiala. Ce e si mai criminal, din punctul meu de vedere, este ca acesti abuzanti se folosesc de versete biblice ca sa manipuleze copii sau sotii/sotiile, au nevoie disperata de a fi el/ea capul, continuind fara sa-si dea seama un blestem generational. Exodus 43:7. Astfel provoca confuzie atat emotionala cit si neurologica in copii sau soti/sotii, provoca boala in corp produsa ca atare de la stresul tot timpul prezent, care incepe sa schimbe DNA-ul in celule si in general impleteste o imagina falsa si negativa a vietii si a lui Dumnezeu. Din punctul meu de vedere, asta este una din metode cu cel mai mare success a duhurilor negative impotriva lui Dumnezeu si creatiei lui. Aceste duhuri negative loveste in copii lui Dumnezeu cu intentia de a rani si de a provoca o atmosfera cheotica, unde pacea, iertarea si dragostea nu mai exista. Vorbesc din experienta. Pina nu am inceput sa iert nu am putut incepe procesul de vindecare. A ierta e cheie atit din punct de vedere fizic (vibratia pozitiva in corp aduce harmonie, ca atare vindecare), emotional (din punct de vedere neurologic, inima comunica cu creierul si cu sistemul digestiv prin a imprastia in corp hormoni si chimicale. Astea pot fi daunatoare ori hranitoare, depinde de starea emotionala a omului.) si spiritual (Efeseni 4: 31-32; e una din singurele cai in care ii legam miinile lui Dumnezeu si dam friu liber duhurilor negative, cu alte cuvinte ne facem singuri necazuri in viata). Multi dau vina pe drac pentru probleme lor, cind in realitate nu au decit sa se uite in oglinda, inclusiv eu. Singuri ne facem probleme dar e mult mai usor de a pune vina pe altul si de a fugi de responsibilitatile noastre decit de a infrunta necazul sau primejdia.

In viata intimpinam multe greutati, ceea ce Isus ne-a facut de cunoscut, dar cum le infruntam e diferenta dintre a crede ca Dumnezeu este de partea noastra sau nu. Emotiile prin care trecem in procesul durerilor e normal, pus in noi de la Dumnezeu, e atitudinea noastra fata de problema care face diferenta intre a zimbi sau a fi plini de furie, cum sint abuzantii care, in realitate, sint oameni slabi fara control sau putere. Si ei stiu treaba asta dar nu vor admite asta veac.

Pentru cei care au trecut prin valea neagra a abuzului: Imi pare rau de treaba asta. Sfat de la altul care a trecut pe acolo: iarta si gindeste in felul urmator-vreau sa fiu fericit/fericita, e mult mai important decit ura si revansa. Va lua timp, si va fi o vindecare treptata dar de meritat. A putea zimbi cu adevarat si cu toata inima si de a simti in propria-ti inima eliberarea trecutului e una din cele mai frumoase experience pe lumea asta. Pe cit posibil indeparteaza-te de abuzant si inconjoara-te cu oameni sanatosi mental si emotional, dar continua sa ierti. Sint zile cind trebuie sa-mi iert tata de patru, cinci, zece, saptezeci de ori. E okay. Continua sa ierti, asta nu inseamna ca trebuie sa continui sa te lasi abuzat (daca cu putin-ta, poate inca esti copil si stai cu parintii, in cazul asta, nu ura ca te ranesti pe tine insu-ti). Pe mine ma salvat Dumnezeu, desi in uram (datorita imaginii false si negative primi-te ca educatie de la un abuzant), dar in timp, usor mi-am deschis inima pentru ca am vazut dragostea reala (desi mi-a fost greau sa o accept o perioadade timp). Azi stiu cu fermitate ca Dumenzeu ma iubeste, pentru mine el este imaginea noua a unui tata si comunic zilnic cu el, cum as comunica cu un tata iubitor, daca as fi avut unul pe pamint.

Doamne, iti multumesc pentru ca esti cu toti cei in durere si abuza-ti, pentru ca ii iubesti fara nici o conditie atasata in mod manipulator, si ca le dai putere celor in necaz sa ierte si sa-ti simta dragostea in inimile lor. Amin.

 

 

The “beauty glow” of Lyme

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Photo above: new treatment for Lyme and co-infections. Burner protocol (Lyme 2) I always take it with Burbur-Pinella (helps with any hers reactions, in fact it keeps me from having one), Sida is for Babesia and I take it with Burbur detox as well, the Crypto-Plus is a Microbial tincture I usually take it with Pectasol C (not in the picture), Chlorella and Chlorophil are detoxing agents for mercury residue and other toxicity in the body. In addition I take Vit. C, D, B-stress complex, magnesium, Omega’s, Turmeric, and Progesterone cream.

My family’s story is unique to us, but I realize its not an unique story in the grand scale of things. These past few weeks, I’ve tried to paint an image of God’s blessings in our lives, depsite the hardships and disappointments.

I had time to write due to a relapse of the Babesia Duncani parasite somewhat like malaria, a co-infection pathogen of Lyme, that needs a different treatment than Lyme. The best treatment for me is either Artesunate IVs, but since my veins have been collapsing lately, I moved on to my second favorite and far less expensive treatment called Sida Plus Liquid Extract (tincture). It really works, even if a tad slower than an IV, but that’s fine with me. To say that I’m tired of needles is an understatement.

Speaking on behalf of Lyme sufferers, this battle is not a walk in the park, its more like swimming across the Atlantic Ocean expecting not to drown in the process. A bit unrealistic and far harder than it looks. Amids all the pain, neaurological issues and emotional turmoil, to hear the phrase:”But you don’t look sick” it’s demoralizing. I’ve heard that sentence many times, however I realized after a while, that I had the “beauty glow”, a glow you get when you’re a bit flushed, except Lyme fighters have a fever 90% of the time, usually a low fever. I either got the glow or the ghostly white look, it was usually in those two extremes. I love the glow:) But I wish I could zip off my skin and show everyone, on a molecular level, the intense battle going on inside. However, since I removed my mercury fillings I recover faster and I am stronger, even in my weak moments. We’re moving, thus the stress. In addition I’m going through the mercury residue detox, which usually can last up to six months. But it gave me an opportunity to share some memories with you, and I’ll continue to do so now and than, because I have more people in my life towards whom I feel gratitude.

I’ll add some Lyme humor and I know some of you will know exactly what I’m talking about:)

Before Lyme; Normal urine color.

After Lyme: I’m urinating blood because I ran out of the yellow color:)

Before Lyme: Garlic was a delicious ingredient in all my cooking.

After Lyme: Herx reaction inducer.

Before Lyme: Gluten was my best friend.

After Lyme: Gluten betrayed me deeply sending me to the ER, making me look nine months pregnant within 3 minutes after consumption while feeling 140 years old. The joint pain has been by far the biggest blow.

Before Lyme: Loosing my hair was a rarity.

After Lyme: I can make a pillow from the hair I lost last months alone.

Before Lyme: You gorgeous eyelashes, you:)

After Lyme: Who stole my eyelashes? Better bring them back!

Before Lyme: Desert was the thing to look forward to:)

After Lyme: Sugar is the priest above my coffin.

Before Lyme: What rashes? Never had those things.

After Lyme: Og my gosh! What happened to my skin! It for sneezed on by pink spots!

Before Lyme: Loved the crowds.

After Lyme: Hiding in my room is my favorite social activity.

Before Lyme: I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember.

After Lyme: What…. is there…words…nothing…bed.

To all the Lyme sufferers, have a good day today, you know, you new definition of a good day:)

 

Simona-Verisoara Mea

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La majoratul lui Alin, fratele mai mare a lui Simona. Din pacate nu e in fotografie. Eu cu Simona sintem in spate, cele mai copile:)

Simona, verisoara de pe partea mamei mele, e mai tinara cu citiva ani de mine, dar nu cu mult.

In 1976 parintii mei sau mutat din Bototsani, in orasul tinar numit, Hunedoara, oras construit in jurul noului Combinat Siderurgic Hunedoara, la insistenta unchiului Ionel, tatal Simonei. Cu economia subreda a Moldovei,  nu a fost greu pentru o familie tinara a fi convinsa sa se mute, mai ales cum locurile de munca erau din abundenta in Combinat, la acea vreme. Tata lucra ca rectificator si mama ca macaragista.

In contrast cu viata mea, Simona a dus o copilarie singuratica, datorita distantei de virsta intre ea si singurul frate al ei, Alin. In schimb a avut o viata bogata sociala in biserica Baptista din Cheangai. Cu doi parinti la lucru si numai doi copii, Simona nu a prea dus lipsa de nevoile materiale in schimb presiunea pusa pe umerii ei de a fi elev de nota 10 si singuratatea copilariei au fost o latura mai amara.

Primul majorat la care am fost invitata a fost a lui Alin, fratele Simonei si verisorul meu mai mare:) A fost o seara foarte frumoasa desi eram copila inca si cam stinghera vazindu-ma inconjurata de adolescenti mai mari. Dar nu am sa uit niciodata acea seara frumoasa:) Eu cu Simona, am petrecut momente frumoase impreuna, mai ales in timpul  de adolescenta, ori de cite ori ni se dadea voie de la parinti sa ne intilnim. La ea am petrecut si citeva nopti, jucindu-ne si vorbind de-ale noastre:)

Dar Simona mi-a fost de mare ajutor dupa ce l-am intilnit pe Chet si primeam scrisorile lui. Fata inteligenta cu cunostinte bune a limbii Engleze, Simona mi-a tradus marea majoritate a scrisorilor. (Edy mi-a tradus si el una sau doua scrisori). Cum primeam o scrisoare cum fugeam pina la Simona, si stateam pe balconul inchis (transformat intr-un refugiu perfect pentru a citi si visa) asteptind cu nerabdare sa-mi traduca cele scrise. Dupa acea, visam amindoua cu ochii deschisi, imaginindu-ne cum ar fi viata de casnicie sau ce diferenta este intre America si Romania.

Simona, de tinara a fost implicata in muzica si cinta mult in biserici. Cinta pina si in ziua de azi, si acuma, Adelina, singurul copil a lui Simona si sotului ei, cinta si ea profesional.

Mi-aduc aminte cam intre virsta de 10-13 ani, am cazut la pat intr-un fel de coma de febra timp de trei zile, si dupa doua zile de inconstienta non-stop, mi-am deschis ochii, si totul era confuz si ca in ceata, dar am vazut-o pe mama mea si tusa Ghinuta (mama lui Simona), pe scaune linga patul meu discutind incetul. Tanti Ghinuta avea o plasa de mere, si mi-a dat un mar cind a vazut ca am deschis ochii, dar imediat am plutit inapoi in lumea de intuneric unde am ramas iara timp de peste douazeci de ore. Fructele au fost intotdeauna o slabiciune a mea si le preferam in locul prajiturilor sau a bomboanelor.

Am memorii frumoase cu Simona si deabea astept sa o revad dupa atitea ani. Sper ca va fi curind. Iti doresc in continuare o viata binecuvintata draga Simona, si numai sanatate:)

Simona- my cousin

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First picture. Simona on her baptism day with a local friend.

Second picture.  Bunch of friends from the Baptist church Simona and her family attended on her older brother, Alin’s eighteenth B-day Party (not in the picture, in fact I do not have a picture of him). Simona and I are in the back, the two youngest kids there:)

In actuality, Simona is my third cousin on my mother’s side. Same as Mirela, but that’s another story for another time.

It was Simona’s father, Ionel, who enticed my parents to move all the way from Moldova to Transylvania, more precisely to the young city of Hunedoara, where a new steel factory just got built and jobs were “falling from the skies” so to speak. Moldova’s economy was in ruin, not sure if much of that changed today, and most of the young people migrated south, west and east all over the country, where jobs were easier to come by. Sergiu was the first-born in Hunedoara, (Alin and I were born in Botosani). My young parents moved to Hunedoara in 1976 and left that town only recently, moving closer to their remaining children in Romania. The move was unexpected and sudden due to my mother’s declining health.

Unlike me, Simona grew up in a much smaller family. Her only sibling was an older brother, Alin. The age and gender gap forced a lonely Simona childhood on Simona. However, during her adolescence that loneliness was well-balanced with a very active social life in the local Baptist church she attended. There she began her singing career and her lovely voice is also passed down to her one and only daughter.

Both her parents worked which it simply meant a better financial life, overshadowed by the high pressures for academic success. My parents never seemed to have time or interest about our academic success and we surprised ourselves how well we still did in spite of that. Simona’s parents on the other hand were hands on, diligent and persistent. Learning English was one of those academic demands and I was very glad she learned the foreign language, especially after I met Chet. I would take my letters and run all the way to her apartment eager to find out what Chet wrote to me. After words, with a  dreamy expression on our faces, we would lie down on her sofa or sit outside on her enclosed balcony wondering what a married life had to offer to our livers or how different American life was from ours. I would soon found out about both. I knew I was blessed with Chet in my life, and I saw the longing in many of my female friends but I couldn’t do anything about it except share pieces of this unique experience with some of them. Simona and I sure shared some nice times together:) Younger by a couple of year we hung out with each other only when we were allowed by our parents. I had a couple rare and precious sleep overs at her apartment and I loved the quietness, the books she had and the board games we played. Also the food, hmm, she always had good food:)

My first “majorat” as it is called in Romanian, which stands for turning eighteen, the age when you’re considered an adult in Europe, meaning you can drink (which we did not do) it was for Alin, Simona’s older brother-second picture. I was young both in age and mind, naive and gullible. In fact, Simona and I were the youngest two out of everyone there and tried hard to fit in and play along the fun games that were totally foreign to me. I lost a lot and tried to keep up a brave facade but I had a wonderful time that evening. The Christian parties of that time were very safe and had such an innocence to the whole experience, something I appreciated both then and later on in life.

Well, my little cuz (short for cousin) was a fresh breath of air for me, and I do remember one of my best friends having a crush on her, something that brought a touch of jealousy in my heart at the time:)))))

While in a three-day fever unconscious state, between the ages of 10-13 years old (can’t remember exactly), I do remember in one of my brief waking moments, Simona’s mother, miss Ghinuta, sitting with my mother by my bed side holding a bag of apples, apples she brought along for us. I always preferred fruits over deserts. I opened my eyes and they were talking to each other only to slip back into darkness for another twenty hours. Miss Ghinuta and her husband Ionel were always nice to me. Alin too, even though her liked to tease us any chance he got. At least his sense of humor was not dangerous and painful:)

Simona, if you read this, and I hope you will, I miss you and I look forward one day to see you and catch up on life:))))))

Thank you God for my cuz:)