Psalm 23

The Lord renews my strength. Any one of you or I that are in the midst of situations that tempt a way of fear in your thinking, we’re not alone. We all experience fear in our lives, but being trapped in a fearful way of living is where the danger lies, for you and for me. I have to regroup my thoughts often lately and I have to refocus often.

Chet had a lingering nasty flu for more than two weeks after being down and fighting with a previous nasty flue two months ago that lasted over a month and seeing a strong man battle something, sometimes for us females its a little frightening (or annoying for others). Meleah my daughter had a 101.2 F fever on Sunday and a 99.6 F yesterday and was in a state I rarely see her in. But she went to school today armed with cough medicine. We’ve been on a active journey to help our eldest son move on his own, so far unsuccessful, despite our collective efforts (Merrill’s and ours) and now he’s in danger of being without a place to leave close to his work. He’s always welcome here, but we live far from where he works and he does not drive yet. My health (symptoms) have been worrisome the past three weeks, although I’m slowly climbing out of the scary hole through juicing and treatment. Today I’ll see a dentist for the first time in 15 years and we’ll start the process of removing the mercury fillings. But most pressing matter is my mom’s health. She’s been transported from urgent care in one town to another urgent care in another town back in Romania. She’s been vomiting daily the past three weeks and she’s very weak. One kidney is totally shot and it looks like the other one is in morbid condition. Her creatine level is very high, in fact so high all the doctors are surprised she’s still standing or alive. But that’s my mom. Since I remember she’s had intermittent issues so severe most doctors marveled she was still alive. But she’s a fighter, and she’s a believer in God. As I write the whole family sits in waiting on news about her. Thank God my sister Delia and my brother Iulian is there with her, both of them nurses with great experience in medicine. That gives the rest of us a small relief. Update: She got admitted and tests will follow with a treatment plan most likely. I just saw a picture of her and the color on her face is better:)

Why am I telling you all this?

To encourage you in your own struggling times. Do I experience fear? Yes. Lately, quite often. Do I let fear determine my way of thinking and let it cloud my knowledge? I hope not. I know I fight against that with every knowledge I have but mostly I fight it off with my own memories of God being on my side over, and over, and over throughout my life. That’s what keeps me strong, that’s what keeps me going. Not religion, not religious words with little meaning, but experience. My experience with God and the support system of my family and friends. In fact, we constantly encourage each other, because some of my friends have gone thought great losses recently and hard times. But we’re here for each other and that’s why I’m writing this. We’re here for each other, as we should.

God Bless you all.